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[T677.Ebook] Ebook Download The Education of Will: A Mutual Memoir of a Woman and Her Dog, by Patricia B. McConnell

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The Education of Will: A Mutual Memoir of a Woman and Her Dog, by Patricia B. McConnell

The Education of Will: A Mutual Memoir of a Woman and Her Dog, by Patricia B. McConnell



The Education of Will: A Mutual Memoir of a Woman and Her Dog, by Patricia B. McConnell

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The Education of Will: A Mutual Memoir of a Woman and Her Dog, by Patricia B. McConnell

In this powerful, soul-searching memoir, beautifully written in the vein of A Pack of Two and Wild, animal behaviorist Dr. Patricia McConnell recounts for the first time the compelling story of her dark past, memories of which are triggered by a troubled dog named Will.

World-renowned as a source of science and soul, Patricia McConnell combines brilliant insights into canine behavior—gained from her work with aggressive and fearful dogs—with heartwarming stories of her own dogs and their life on the farm. Now, she reveals that it wasn’t just the dogs who had serious problems. For decades Dr. McConnell secretly grappled with her own guilt and fear, which were rooted in the harrowing traumas of her youth.

Patricia is forced to face her past by her love for a young Border Collie named Will, whose frequent, unpredictable outbreaks of fear and fury shake Patricia to her core. In order to save Will from this dangerous behavior, she must find her own will to heal, and along the way learn that will power by itself is not enough.

Interweaving enlightening stories of her clients’ dogs with tales of her deepening bond with Will, Patricia recounts her fight to reclaim her life. Hopeful and inspiring, the redemptive message of her journey is that, while trauma changes our brains and the past casts a long shadow, healing, for both people and dogs, is possible through hard work, compassion, and mutual devotion.

  • Sales Rank: #4172 in Books
  • Published on: 2017-02-21
  • Released on: 2017-02-21
  • Original language: English
  • Dimensions: 9.00" h x 1.00" w x 6.00" l, .0 pounds
  • Binding: Hardcover
  • 288 pages

Review
"In addition to information sure to appeal to dog lovers, the author provides a compassionate account of the reclamation of her life from abuse and shame. An uplifting story of hope about how both dogs and humans need "a sense that they are not helpless victims."" (Kirkus)

"This powerful memoir twines the lives of an extraordinary dog and an extraordinary woman. Their courageous, compelling story will profoundly deepen your understanding of people and animals, fear and shame, love and listening." (Sy Montgomery, author of THE SOUL OF AN OCTOPUS)

"This inspirational memoir is, above all, a book about redemption. McConnell faces her own history of trauma as she tries to understand and heal her fearful, reactive border collie, Willie. Replete with McConnell’s fascinating and often humorous insights about working with wonderful and sometimes wounded dogs, this is much more than a book about training dogs. The Education of Will engages in an intimate and challenging conversation with the reader: about saving yourself, saving others, and allowing others to save you. It is original, powerful, heartwrenching in its honesty — and filled with a comforting, gentle grace." (Cat Warren, author of What the Dog Knows)

"Patricia McConnell may be the finest popularizer of the science of animal behavior we have today, and for many dog owners, myself included, she’s long been a wise and witty guiding light. With The Education of Will, her intensely personal and frankly brave memoir, she examines her own traumatic history with characteristic insight, honesty, and intellectual tenacity. The result is a fascinating portrait of the deepest of connections being forged between one woman and one dog — and just how high the stakes are for both. Patricia McConnell is a treasure, and we're very lucky indeed that she wrote this story." (David Wroblewski, author of THE STORY OF EDGAR SAWTELLE)

"The Education of Will delves deep into the minds of people and dogs, and into the effects of trauma, showing that healing is possible. McConnell gives a voice to those who can’t speak in words and provides hope for fearful animals everywhere.” (Temple Grandin, author of Animals Make Us Human and Animals in Translation)

"An unflinching look at trauma and how one woman grows beyond it—beside a wondrous, troubled spark of a dog who needs her help and helps her know herself. Wisdom earned in the hardest places, dog and human, carries with it a message of hope. The Education of Will is riveting from the first page to the last and will reach many readers who long to put all kinds of burdens down." (Susannah Charleson, author of Scent of the Missing and The Possibility Dogs)

"McConnell has written an inspiring and courageous book about the mysteries of the love between humans and dogs and how that love can bring healing and forgiveness after trauma. Anyone who has ever loved a pet—especially a dog—will discover new and powerful insights into how that bond can lead to liberation, even from even our most hidden and crippling shames. The Education of Will brought me to tears and laughter, amazement and admiration. McConnell has dramatically advanced the growing body of literature that explores post-traumatic stress syndrome and how our life force—and that of our beloved dogs—leads us to truth-telling and a reconnection with ourselves and society." (Nancy V. Raine, author of After Silence)

"In The Education of Will, Patricia McConnell writes with unflinching honesty, vulnerability, and warmth. She wraps her reader in the highs and lows of a life lived beautifully, through gut-wrenching traumas, hard-won victories, unexpected romances, and tear-jerking setbacks. Through it all, McConnell depicts the natural world (and of course, dogs) with masterful reverence and passion. A tremendously winning memoir."
  (NICKOLAS BUTLER, author of Shotgun Lovesongs, Beneath the Bonfire, and The Hearts of Men)

Praise for The Other End of the Leash

"Patricia McConnell has written the You Just Don't Understand of the human-canine relationship. . . . This humorous, well-written book tells us what to do and what to avoid based on years of studying dogs and their primate owners." (Frans de Waal, Ph.D., author of Are We Smart Enough to Know How Smart Animals Are?)

"This book is more than a story of a bad dog turned better, and it is more than a recitation of how dogs can help people. McConnell achieves something simple, honest, and beautiful in a book about a troubled woman and her troubled dog." (Booklist Magazine)

“It takes bravery to share such deeply personal and traumatic details from her life. Readers, even those who know McConnell’s work well, will be struck by how vulnerable she makes herself and how personal this book is.” (TheBark.com)

“[McConnell’s] openness and bravery benefit both species. Centering on themes of trauma, recovery, shame, fear, setbacks, and healing, The Education of Will is captivating, a page-turner in fact.” (Scientific American)

“Opposable thumbs and all paws up for McConnell’s newest book, The Education of Will. This is not a training book, although in a way it is as the reader will gain insight as to what it takes to work with dogs that present fear or aggression.” (Seattle PI)

"The book is a fascinating read with enough dog and human examples, personal experiences, and animal behavior to satisfy every type of reader.” (Smart Dog University)

About the Author
Patricia McConnell, PhD, is an internationally known Zoologist and Certified Applied Animal Behaviorist who has treated serious behavior problems in dogs for over twenty-five years. She speaks around the world about canine behavior and training, and is the author of fourteen books, including the critically acclaimed The Other End of the Leash: Why We Do What We Do around Dogs. Dr. McConnell lives with her dogs and husband on a small farm near Madison, Wisconsin.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
The Education of Will CHAPTER ONE
The border collie puppy had eyes like fuzzy diamonds and fur so soft that my hands melted into it as if they had lost their bones. He was eight weeks old when I met him, sitting on the grass at his breeder’s, with the sheep in the lambing shed bawling to their babies and the crickets buzzing in the woods behind the farmhouse. I didn’t need another dog. I already had three, and I wasn’t looking for a puppy.

I was busy. Busy seeing clients whose pets had serious behavior problems, teaching at the University of Wisconsin, cohosting a radio show, giving speeches on canine behavior, writing books, and running a dog-training business. I didn’t need more to do.

But I had heard of a litter that was closely related to my once-in-a-lifetime dog, Cool Hand Luke. Luke had not only changed my life, he might have saved it, in a made-for-television moment when I came close to being horribly hurt and he could have died. I’d been pinned in a corner of a horse stall by a Scottish Blackface ewe who had just had a lamb and perceived me as a hungry wolf intent on killing her newborn. When she ducked her head and charged me the first time, I dodged to the right and laughed it off. Then she charged again and just missed me. Her head smashed into the barn wall so hard that a confetti of paint flakes fell from the ceiling. She charged once more and I retreated to a corner, looking around for a piece of wood, a bucket, anything I could use to protect myself.

We don’t go through life aware of our own fragility until we have nothing but our own bodies to protect ourselves. No horns. No thick skin and fur. No bristles or claws. Useless little teeth. Put us up against an animal with a built-in security system and we come up short. I’d spent years as an applied animal behaviorist dealing with aggressive dogs. I was used to snarling canines of all kinds who would have bitten me if I’d made the wrong move. But I hadn’t expected to be trapped in the corner of a barn by a crazed ewe.

Crystal the ewe charged again and grazed my thigh. She was known for her bad temper, but she was a sheep, not a two-thousand-pound bull or a muscled-up dog threatening to put me in the hospital. But my irritation began to morph into fear. I couldn’t seem to get out of the corner and out of the pen. I was alone on the farm, and if I were badly injured, I wouldn’t be missed for days.

That’s when I heard it: thwap! Luke’s paws hit the top of the four-foot stall as he scrambled over the pen like a military dog on maneuvers and hit the ground between Crystal and me. As she turned her attention to him, I scrambled toward the gate. Crystal tucked her head down so far that her chin was tucked under her chest, exposing only her two-inch-thick skull and curved horns. She went for Luke. He charged back, biting at her skull to keep her at bay while I made it out of the gate. After two more charges, Luke made his own escape. A thin stream of blood trickled from his mouth. Two of his front teeth had been broken off.

It is one thing to love a dog, to love him so much that sometimes you ache just talking about him. It is another thing altogether to know that he risked his life to save you from serious injury. But Luke was more than the star of this one dramatic moment; he was one of those old souls whose love of life leaves you glowing in its presence. I once wrote about Luke: “I imagine his death as if all the oxygen is sucked out of the air, and I am expected to live without it.” Of course he died, and of course I didn’t—but it took me years to stop grieving his untimely death from kidney failure when he was only twelve years old.

That was why the prospect of bringing home his nephew two years later was so seductive, despite having a house full of other dogs. All the dogs in Luke’s line are famous for their noble dispositions; I had high hopes that this litter would have a pup with some of Luke’s personality. Intellectually, I knew full well that every dog is unique, and dogs like Luke are hard to find. But still, how could I pass up the chance that one of the pups of the litter would replicate some of Luke’s brilliance?

When I arrived to evaluate the litter, I pretended, mostly to myself, that I was making a careful and considered choice. The puppies tussled on the ground, interrupting their play only to leap after butterflies, sniff my jeans, or lick my face with velveteen tongues. I focused on the two male pups, since I had three females at home already. One male was a big, flashy boy with a wide white collar of fur, the other a bit plainer. I couldn’t decide between them.

The breeder allowed to me to take them both home for a three-day trial period. It was a win/win—the pups would be exposed to a new environment at an important age, and I would see how they got along with my other dogs. After a few days, I could decide if one of them was right for me.

When I got home, the boys tumbled out of the crate as if out of a clown car. In turn, they met my three other dogs, each of whom performed a leading role at the farm. Tulip, the elderly Great Pyrenees whose radiance of white fur charmed everyone she met, was struggling with irritable bowel syndrome and a progressive neuromuscular disease. She’d been in the critical care unit at the local vet school three times that year. After each incident, she recovered and went back to being the farm’s jokester, a cross between an oversize seal pup and a benevolent polar bear. For twelve years she had multitasked as the farm’s protector and stand-up comedian. I felt I owed her anything I could do to keep her comfortable.

Pippy Tay, a fifteen-year-old border collie, had always been a paragon of health. For years, she was Watson to my Sherlock, assisting me in teasing out the reasons why so many of my clients’ dogs were aggressive to members of their own species. Over the years I’d seen at least a hundred dogs standing stiff-legged and snarling while Pippy bowed and curtsied a safe distance away. Within minutes, the visiting dog would melt like ice cream in the sun, and soon they would be playing, while my clients’ eyes filled with tears of happiness. But Pippy was losing her eyesight and hearing and had long since been retired. I was thrilled she had done so well for so long; I had never counted on her living to the ripe old age of fifteen. Like Tulip, she now needed a lot of care.

My third dog, Lassie, a twelve-year-old border collie, was the baby of the group. Vital and energetic, my go-to dog on sheep and still as playful as a puppy, Lassie nonetheless suffered from chronic bladder infections that belied her youthful looks. We spent untold hours with veterinarians trying to figure out what was wrong.

You might say that this was not an ideal time to get a puppy. You would be right. I calculated that I had been bringing my dogs to the vet 2.4 times a week for almost half a year. You know it’s bad when you take the time to figure that out. With a decimal.

Did I really have the energy to raise a puppy? To be on guard at all times, to take the pup outside every ten minutes, and to gently remove the shoes, the remote control, or the pillow from its mouth? I had wanted a young dog for several years but had decided to wait until Pippy died. But even in old age, Pippy was thrilled when puppies visited, so I began to rethink my plan. Besides, I needed something healthy and joyful to make me laugh, to remind me that there was more to life than a slow spiral toward death.

Both pups settled into the farm quickly enough, following the tracks of chipmunks behind the house, playing with toys on the threadbare Oriental rug in the living room. But one of them followed me everywhere and seemed to care deeply about what I was doing and where I was going. His brother was better-looking but a bit more independent. Every time I gazed down at the plain one, he was looking up at me with soft, radiant eyes.

What is it about eyes that convey so much information but whose qualities seem beyond language? We have so few words to describe the depth of spirit and emotion conveyed by eyes that they all seem a bit trite. But it was his eyes that hooked me. I’d look down at this black-and-white fluff ball, and he’d gaze at me, his eyes looking deep into mine. Imploringly, as if always asking me a question. I didn’t know what it was, but somehow it seemed imperative that I find the answer. I knew by the end of the first day that I couldn’t let him go. I named him Will.

• • • • •

That night, Will and I cuddled together on the living room floor, his little puppy body curled up on my stomach while the three girls encircled us. I stroked their bellies and scratched their ears and murmured to them that life was good, and no matter what happened next, love and determination would see us through.

Most helpful customer reviews

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
Extraordinary, intellectual, and yet a real page-turner
By Book Reviewer 2009
This turned out to be an extraordinary book, a true page-turner. The author writes very well, and her true story just flows along like the most well-written novel: personal, relatable, believable, and vivid. Several of her nature descriptions (and she keeps them succinct and infrequent) approach poetry. Her insights on human nature and what trauma does to the mind are deeply perceptive. In addition, she is very erudite and well-read; she alludes to many related concepts concerning dogs, companionship, stress, trauma, and healing from across the humanities and sciences, which makes for a deep, intellectual read. Plus, anyone planning to adopt a rescue dog should read this book. It's a real eye-opener. There are two themes in this book: (1) the author's own personal trauma, and her healing, and (2) her interactions with her dog. She keeps these two themes well-balanced with maybe 35 percent of the book reflecting her own trauma and 65 percent portraying the dog. So if you're attracted to this book because it's a dog story (which I was), you probably won't feel when reading it that the non-dog themes get too much attention. Instead, they support and deepen the story of the dog and his owner. I found this book a real keeper and plan to re-read it.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
A cathartic memoir of a traumatized woman and her traumatized dog
By manusso
If you ever were traumatized in any way, whether you have a dog or you do not, this is a heartfelt, compassionate, helping book that speaks to the heart of trauma. Although this mutual memoir reads well and is poetically written, it talks of deep wounds and profound silences. Some parts are (very) painful to read, as they they relate horrible experiences, but are indeed quite helpful when you know the inexpressible pain caused by (a) trauma(s). In her case, the author had been molested, raped, witnessed someone die at her feet (to name but the main ones discussed in this book), all along dealing with the other traumas of loving dog owners and their "problem dog" -a category in which the author includes herself: Willie and his canine issues trigger the resolution for Patrica McConnell to put an end to both of them being suffering victims. " (...) Underneath my love of animals, I was motivated by something else. After years of feeling like I had no voice, I wanted to be the one with something to say, even though I was afraid to do so. Everyone needs a voice and needs to be listened to. Including dogs. Maybe I could give them that. Maybe I could give it to myself." Their story is cathartic, and compassionately liberating. --And of course, as always with Patricia McConnell, we learn so much about dogs, our relationships with them, and consequently ourselves.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
... decade ago and it couldn’t have come at a better time. Most of my understanding of dog behavior ...
By Andrew Ross Loomis
I read “The Other End of the Leash” about a decade ago and it couldn’t have come at a better time. Most of my understanding of dog behavior mostly came from television and casual conversation, and that meant it was heavy “leadership” and often poorly articulated pack theory. Sadly, my dog was paying the price. Dr. McConnell’s book explained, in clear, grounded detail, how humans and canines live and communicate differently and how we can best bridge the differences between us.

But it’s her willingness to share her own experiences makes her writing so effective. It’s as if, after explaining the theory and mechanics of behavior modification and training, she turns to the reader and says, “here, I’ll show you.” She shares not just lessons learned, but the deep, abiding love she has for her own dogs, and by example, gave me permission to love my own dogs in a similar way. In a field obsessed with confidence and leadership, her emphasis and nurture and species-appropriate expression was so welcome and needed in my own life.

“The Education of Will” extends that approach in a difficult but necessary way. Simply put, Dr. McConnell shows us that we bring our past with us into every relationship we enter, including those with our beloved dogs. And for those who have endured serious trauma, PTSD may well play a central role in how those relationships develop. Both dogs and human suffer trauma, and it can deeply affect their relationships with others.

I think I most appreciate this book because it emphasizes, in compelling detail, how much fear drives canine and human behavior. For all the research out there that confirms this, people still don’t seem to fully appreciate this fact when it comes to their own beloved dogs. Thanks to Dr. McConnell for yet another book that will help many, many dogs.

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